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Tuesday, June 29, 2010

I Hate This

Here it goes...and if you don't want to hear me vent then don't read. But you can all probably relate so that's why I'm writing.

I Hate This! What you say? DEPLOYMENT!!! AHHH. It's just getting to me right now. Probably because I've just started back in classes so I'm extra busy and stressed. Therefore, not having A to talk to whenever I want just sucks. I hate it. I want him home. I want him sitting here next to me right now. I just want him back. I feel like when he left in December it was hard...but now that he left after R&R it has gotten harder. It was such a tease having him home for 2 weeks. We had a great time together but I hated having to say good-bye again.

With the way his work schedule is right now, we figured out a couple days ago that the best time to talk is when he gets up for the day and I am off to bed (or half asleep as it was last night!). So I've just been leaving Skype up on my computer when I go to bed and he calls when he gets up. It's been great getting to talk to him and see him before I go to sleep and I've been able to sleep better for the last couple days. That of course has been nice. However, last night I got on facebook at the same time as talking to him and was looking at pictures. When we decided I needed to get some sleep and he needed to get to work, we got off Skype. He also was on Facebook so I sent him a chat message letting him know that I love him! At that point we talked on there for a couple more minutes and I started crying. I dunno. He was saying the perfect things and all but I hate it. I am just glad that I was able to keep those tears in until we got off Skype. I miss him so much and can't wait for him to get back. I'll be fine and get over this funk I'm in right now. But I still HATE IT!

There's my rant for the moment. For those of you who read this...thanks! I'm sure many of you can completely understand.

10 comments:

  1. I hear ya lady!! Half way there though!

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  2. Aww! I'm so sorry that you're going through a rough time. *hugs*

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  3. Honey we all go through that. Last week I was pitching a fit b/c Mr. Man is away and I needed him here. Never worry about venting!

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  4. The second goodbye was ten times harder but we r at 200 days tomorrow!!!

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  5. Sweetie your going to continue to have moments like these...I will be perfectly honest..it won't get better. You'll learn how to just cope better with the pain of missing him. Your strong and keep this is mind. He needs you to be strong for him. I had to learn all this with no help.(I didn't know about the blogger-world when my Mr. was staioned for 2 years..)
    This will make you so flippin' strong girl. You get through this and you and your man will be able to overcome every silly obstacle that comes your way! Just hang on...be strong.
    These moments of sadness are very normal. The Military wife in you needs to overcome to civilain wife in ya and stand your ground! This is nothing compared to the rest of your lives you'll spend with each other. Yes, it seems like eternity...but's it's such a small fraction of your next 60+ years together. You'll look back after this is all said and done, and you two will be wonderful!
    Take this oppertunity and learn your inner strength. I did. I had no idea how strong I was..heck ya-I broke down in tears several times..driving,in the shower,at work,.....but it became less frequent and just me smiling while thinking of our last conversation...
    I'm sorry if I sound like a run-on sentence...
    if you ever need to talk....jtruearmywife@yahoo.com
    xoxooxoxoxo thinking of you xoxooxox

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  6. I understand. I hope it gets easier for you as the days until you see him again become fewer.

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  7. Ugh. Hate this for you! Hang in there!

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  8. I totally feel ya! I'm sorry that things are very sucky and stressful (and emotional) but you are half way done! The first half is over and I know that R&R is a tease but the next time you see him, it's for KEEPS! haha

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